Aruba, Again. Also, Christmas 2012.

Being in Aruba for Christmas was awesome in some ways. I can't say there is anything particularly magical about the island during the Christmas season. Yes, there were Christmas trees at every roundabout, and we made a visit to the Cas di Lus (a fake little traditional house they build up on a hill and decorate with lots of Christmas lights). We also noticed it was Christmas when our beloved pan keshi (cheese bread) was sold out by the time we got there at noon on Christmas Eve. But otherwise, it felt a lot like being in Aruba at any other time of year (which is AWESOME, by the way).

The perfect part, though, was going to Church on Sunday, and going to the branch Christmas party on Sunday night. Several people performed Christmas musical numbers, we ate great food, and TONS of people were there. I have never seen that branch building so full before. Chad and I sang, "Merry Christmas, Baby," with Chad playing guitar and me playing piano. I'm really good at agreeing to musical numbers and forgetting that I get really nervous and embarrassed when I actually perform. But overall, the party was great.

Going back to Philadelphia on Christmas Eve was a great choice. We had so much fun being there for Christmas morning. I spent most of the day Christmas Day playing music with Kaitlyn and Ainslee--Kaitlyn got a ukelele for Christmas, and Ainslee plays guitar. We did some mad Taylor Swift and Ingrid Michaelson covers. It was so fun!

This was my first year not going home to Colorado for Christmas (other than on the mission). I definitely missed my family, but altogether, I'd say it was a great Christmas. Also, Chad and I decided a couple months ago to celebrate Three King's Day (Dia de Reyes) like they do in Latin countries, so that we wouldn't have to lug all of our presents with us to Philadelphia. So the season continues! Except, we lost our reserve to save the presents and have opened one or two every day, pretty much. Now I think there are...two left. Good thing Dia de Reyes is tomorrow!! :)

Aruba, Part 3

Warning: Lots of pictures today. I could spend the rest of my life documenting this trip on my blog if I only go 2 pictures at a time.

So our second day in Aruba, we woke up and drove to Bright Bakery to pick up one of my favorite treats of all time--pan keshi (cheese bread). It's got Gouda cheese stuffed in the middle of a loaf of slightly sweet bread. (side note: I'm glad we got it that day. We tried a day or two later, and Christmas Eve, and both days they were sold out by the time we got there.) Anyway, bread in tow, we headed to the Hooi Berg (which I had always believed to be the highest point in Aruba, until we went to Arikok National Park on this trip and found out that the highest points are actually within the national park. Boo.) There are stairs all the way to the top, and it takes about half an hour if you don't stop for breaks. It's worth the hike, in my opinion, because you get a good view of most of the island, including the shorelines, the refinery, all the red-tiled roofs, and the cactus. 

The Hooi Berg looks much less puny in real life. Bad angle, I guess.

A view from the top.

Another look from the top.

Made it!

After our hike, we decided to stop by "the Waf." I don't know if I'm spelling that right, because I've never seen it written out. The Waf is where you would probably spend a lot of time if you were a tourist on a cruise ship--it is a strip of little outdoor shops near where the cruise ships come in for the day. It feels just about like any other flea market with trinkets and souvenirs. We stopped by to pick up some gifts, but mostly in hopes that we would run into my dear friends Carlo and Jela, who I got to teach as a missionary years ago. And we were not disappointed! Jela and her son, Carl, were there running their shop. They sell beautiful hand-painted canvases. It was fun to see them again.

Across from the Waf, in front of a fancy shopping area.

with Jela and Carl! 

 We spent some time taking silly pictures and trying pastechi--a typical local food. A pastechi is basically a fried calzone filled with Dutch cheese, or sometimes with cheese and meat. Yum.

pastechi. tastes better than it looks here.

And finally, we headed off to do more snorkeling. As mentioned in an earlier post, we first snorkeled at Baby Beach, which is a fairly popular spot to snorkel. On this, our second time snorkeling, we went to the far west end of the island (before you reach Arashi Beach), which was a spot recommended to us by Bill (a native). Chad was more impressed with the snorkeling here than at Baby Beach, but I got kind of cold and my mask wasn't working great, so it wasn't my best day. But we also stopped by one of the shipwrecks on our way back to San Nicolas, and snorkeled there. It was pretty awesome to snorkel right around the ship, where lots and lots of fishes like to hang out. 

While I'm talking about snorkeling, I'll share what I learned about snorkeling in Aruba. Just in case you're ever in Aruba, or snorkeling in Aruba. :)

Where and How to Snorkel in Aruba:

1. Ask local people where to go. There are certain places marked on the map that attract a lot of tourists, that don't seem to actually be the places where you can see the most fish. A good example of this is Baby Beach. Lots of tourists snorkel in the cove there, and you can see a fair amount of fish. However, someone recommended that we drive just past the Baby Beach parking lot to an area where this is a narrow channel flowing towards Baby Beach. We hopped in and just floated down for half a mile or so. We saw SO MANY FISH. 

2. Sometimes, just stay in one place and stop swimming, but keep your head underwater. I'm not sure if the fish forget you are there, or decide you're not a threat, but sometimes they come out from their hiding places if you just idle for a minute or two.

3. It seems like you find more fish closer to the reefs, so if you are swimming in an inlet with a barrier reef, you might just swim along the reef. 

4. Our favorite places, in order: 1. The channel just east of Baby Beach (tons of fish, NO swimming required, but you do have to walk through some rocks to get to some deep-enough water). 2. Mangel Halto (feels like a neighborhood beach, big area to cover and plenty of fish in some areas). 3. Baby Beach (nice area, especially if you want to lay on the beach when you're done snorkeling). 4. The beach between the shipwreck and Arashi Beach, near the west end of the island (I can't remember much about this one, but I think there was a nice beach area to lay out on and plenty of fish).  

5. It would be so awesome to have an underwater camera. We saw so many amazing fish and we wished we could get pictures. Although, sometimes it is nice to just enjoy something without focusing on documenting all the time. 

6. Your experience could be totally different than ours depending on the time of day, the weather, or your personal preferences. Just explore and have fun!

Aruba, Part 2

So, where was I? Snorkeling, right?

Much of our trip was spent going to church functions and also visiting people I had gotten to know as a missionary.

I had a blast introducing Chad to Sister Dowling. I had explained to him before we went that she is sort of... mean. Okay, not really. She just pretends to be mean, most of the time. But you know she secretly loves you, because after she spends one or two hours delivering berating comments, she'll usually say, "I love you, dushi," as you're on your way out the door. (You can guess why, when I described her that way, Chad wasn't sure how excited he was to meet her.)

Anyway, her advancing age and continued health problems have taken their toll, and she is now confined to her home most of the time. She uses a walker to get around the house, and a wheelchair if she ever leaves the house. So visiting with her was bittersweet, because it is hard to see someone with so much spunk be so limited by her body.

The first day we visited, the exchange went something like this:

Sister Dowling: Who's he?
Me: My husband!
Sister Dowling: Your husband?!
Me: I told you I was bringing him to meet you.
Sister Dowling: You told me you was bringing someone special, you didn't tell me about no husband.
Me: Oh, well, the special person was my husband. This is Chad.
Sister Dowling (turning to Chad): Oh, so you love the ugly woman?
Chad: Er, I think she's pretty...
Sister Dowling: Well, I see you does wear glasses, so I can forgive you for that.

She totally won him over, though, in spite of (or because of?) her sassiness. The hardest part about being there was hearing her repeatedly express the feeling that no one (particularly people from church) cared about her enough to visit. While I know this may have been exaggerated somewhat (several church members reported having some contact with her, if not frequently), it made me sad to think about her living out her old age a lonely, bitter woman. I think I needed the reminder that there are probably people around me who feel no one cares. These pictures aren't the greatest, but the hours spent in her home with Chad will always be a special memory for me.

Mi Dushi Tera: Aruba, Part 1

I'm going to dedicate some time over the next few days to blogging about our 6 glorious days in Aruba. We arrived in the afternoon, so by the time we got through customs, out of the airport, into our rental car, and to San Nicolas where we were staying, it was late afternoon. 

We stayed in a little apartment on the Buckleys' property. Bill and Johanna built the patio area and the apartment (and, I think, their home as well) themselves. It is fairly common in Aruba for people to build their own homes of bricks and stucco. The Buckleys and Sherman were there to meet us when we got there. Sherman had brought us some bread from the bakery, and Bill couldn't wait to show us his massive orchid collection (195 plants, including the one we brought him). Here's the cute apartment we stayed in (although its hard to see for all the huge plants and trees in front).

After getting settled in, we headed for Rogers Beach, a little beach on the east end of the island that rarely sees much traffic. I'm not sure why, other than that maybe people don't like how close it is to the oil refinery. Whatever. It's beautiful. And I LOVED going out there and basically having the beach to ourselves (there were two people there, who left not long after we arrived). 

I was happy for a pretty afternoon on the beach. For me, there is nothing like beautiful white sand, that clear ocean water, and the incredible cloud paintings in the sky.

The next morning, I got my running clothes on and we headed towards Baby Beach. On our way there, we got sidetracked when I remembered a cool area where the water crashes violently against the cliffs and sprays up like a geyser every few seconds. First we took some pictures from a distance, but then we decided to shimmy on down to the sandy shelf just above where the waves were crashing. We got totally soaked. It was awesome!

We headed to Baby Beach afterwards, and went for a little ocean-side run. Then we enjoyed our first day of snorkeling. Okay, "enjoyed" is an understatement. I had been snorkeling once before, so I knew it would be cool. Chad, however, hadn't been and he was like a little child on Christmas the first time his head popped out of the water. So many fish! I wish we had an underwater camera. Really, it was incredible. I was just happy Chad loved it so much--I wanted so badly for him to love my little island like I do. This became the first of several snorkeling excursions on this trip.

After snorkeling, we left the beach and passed a man who had created a makeshift stand with graffiti-like letters spelling "Coconuts" on it. I want to be respectful, but the man seemed a little crazy (only adding to the experience, I might add). He had his giant machete and chopped us up a coconut for us to drink out of.

Fun, fun, fun! More trip pictures to come.

Aruba, Jamaica...nah, I'll just stick with Aruba.

I am so in love with Aruba.

It began when the Lord sent me there for 6 months as a missionary and then for another 3 after some mission time spent in other places.

It continued when I went back a year later because I scored a research grant to learn about marriage education on the island.

I slogged through my master's thesis, which I wrote about the marriage education in Aruba, while fantasizing about being IN ARUBA.

And now, three years later, I keep feeling pulled back to my little "dushi tera" (sweet land). I am obsessed with that place! I've gotten to share it with mission companions, and my parents, and Steve & Barbara Duncan when they came to help out with the research. Next month, I get to share it with the love of my life, so I'm extra extra excited. I hope he loves it as much as I do.

I'm planning on snorkel time, and pastechi/pan keshi (delicious food involving delicious Dutch cheese), and batidos (fresh fruit smoothies), and tracking people down I haven't talked to in 2 years, and lounging. Lots of lounging. I'm sure it'll be cool to see the Christmas lights on all the pretty houses, too. I haven't ever been there at Christmastime. Oh, it's going to be glorious.

This is me, and Chad. Well, it will be me and Chad. 

Sister Gotze

I had the chance to go to a viewing for Filomena Gotze, who passed away last week from a stroke. She and her husband had flown to Utah from Aruba to celebrate their daughter's college graduation and visit with some of her other kids and grandkids.

As I watched the picture slideshow, what really got my attention was her eyes--they just shine in every picture. She looks so tranquil and happy with her grandkids, her kids, her husband, her church friends.

There's a different feeling at a funeral where people know about God's plan. There wasn't lots of crying, although my heart ached for her sweet husband of 40+ years. Still, her kids and husband talked about how things had worked out in a way that let them know God was mindful of them. She was able to spend time with kids and grandkids who lived in the U.S. and Spain, and visit Temple Square just before she died. Temple Square was a place she really loved.

Seeing two sisters I loved from my mission pass away recently has reminded me about the person I want to be. I'm grateful for both of their examples. I'm so grateful that families can be together eternally, through the Atonement of Jesus Christ. I hope I can live worthy of those blessings.

Sister Maylinda

Meet "Sister Maylinda."

Born in the Dominican Republic, she moved to Aruba in her younger years to marry an Aruban. I knew her because I was a missionary in Aruba for 9 months. Every Friday, she had us over for lunch. She made the best food--rice and beans, but they were THE BEST rice and beans I've ever had. She'd usually make us some kind of chicken or meat to go with it. Plus, she'd make fresh passion fruit or mango or pineapple juice. And she'd serve us a little snack-pack pudding for dessert. When we finished lunch, we'd always take our plates over to the sink. Sometimes I would absentmindedly throw the chicken bones from my plate in the trash. She hated that--she saved every scrap so she could give it to the dogs on the side of the road.

She was a very talented seamstress. She ran a successful business for years, but by the time I knew her, she mostly just did favors for people. One time I was with her when she ran into someone who remembered Maylinda from 20 years before because Maylinda had made her wedding dress. She made my companion and me skirts one time--I still remember her exclaiming how VERY WIDE my hips were when she measured me. :) (Thanks to her beans and rice, probably.)

When I went back to Aruba a year after my mission to do research, she let me stay at her house. Even though I didn't expect her to, she doted on me and fed me. She was always putting people up in the spare bedroom in her house--it wasn't just me--and I'm sure she took care of them all, too.

A couple of times as a missionary, I remember having to go through her bedroom to get to the bathroom. Her bedroom was perfectly tidy. The bed was always made. All she really had in there was a set of scriptures sitting on the stand next to her bed. It was simple and clean and focused, just like her.

Maylinda was dependable. Nearly every week, she came with us to the English class we taught, just to be there. (She already spoke fine English.)

She was a sweet grandmother. Her grandkids LOVED spending the day at her house.

She walked to the bus stop every Sunday so she could go to church.

She would respond immediately if she heard someone didn't have anything to eat, by taking them a hot meal.

I remember someone we taught as missionaries who didn't know how to read. Maylinda agreed to have the woman over every week so she could read the scriptures to her. The woman continued to walk to Maylinda's house for months after my companion and I stopped teaching her. All kinds of people felt welcome in her house.

Aruba won't be the same place now that she's gone. I'm grateful for her example, her testimony, and her constant service. Mi ta stima bo pa semper, Hermana Maylinda.

Letter to Dr. Duncan

I just wrote this letter to my mentor Professor, Dr. Duncan. After writing it I thought, "This would make a good update on the research for the blog." So, here it is.

Hey Dr. Duncan,

I'm not sure if you'll be able to reach me today or not (I'll be flying to Curacao for the weekend!) and I don't know if my phone will work there or not. Let me tell you how it has gone this week.

Miraculously we didn't have to cancel any groups this week. We had 3 people at the cohabiting men's group, 3 at the cohabiting women's group, and THIRTEEN professionals last night. (It was a mad house!! In a good way...) Hasette and I have been doing constant recruiting...it has become my full time job! But I think it will work. We've got 3 tough groups to fill for next week--people expecting their first child, and men in their first year of marriage. They're all groups we had to cancel previously. So, pray that the people who we are contacting will come. I went to the midwife doctor's office this week and he called a couple of people for me and then gave me their numbers. And then a couple people who have been in focus groups have been kind enough to refer people.

A couple of questions:

1) what about people who don't want to take the money? Some of them just don't want to take it. That's fine, right? Or are we breaking some sort of ethical research law? Will the IRB come get me in the night?

2) what happens when people attend the wrong focus group? For example, in the single women's group we had a girl come who was engaged. Can I take her comments and move them into the transcription for the appropriate group? It's happened a couple of times.

That's all that comes to mind presently. Hasette is doing better. He's figured out that if we finish the questions on time, he usually has a bit of extra time to talk MARRIAGE ENCOUNTER!!! with his captive audience. With the men's group we ended at 8:40; but don't worry, the remaining 20 minutes we had a live infomercial on Marriage Encounter. :) Hey, I don't mind. As long as it's after the questions are over. That was one funny thing in the focus group last night. A large chunk of them work with Hasette in the family organization he is the PResident of. So, when we asked what resources are available, they all said (in unison), "Pro Famia Feliz!!" And then they kept talking about how great it was. Finally, Brother Buckley asked, "Is this a propaganda?" Hasette smiled and said, "Yes." But then they talked about some other resources. The government has a branch dedicated to family stuff...it just seems like no one knows about it. Hasette didn't even know about it. How crazy is that?! Don't you think the President of a family organization on the island would know about the government's family department? Anyway, there was a marriage and family therapist (I didn't know those existed in Aruba!!) at the group last night, and she works for Aruba's family/couple department. I have an appointment to meet with her before I leave just to chat about her work.

So, things are going well. I'm feeling very grateful for my experience here. Honestly, I don't really want to leave. Hasette introduced me at the focus group last night and suggested to everyone there that they should pray I find an Arubian husband so I can stay and work for families on the island. Haha!! It'll be exciting to put this all together when I get back, though. I do look forward to that. Well, we'll be in touch. Hope you're doing well. Say hi to Barbara for me.

Cammie

Beck the Dog

When I had been a missionary in Aruba for a few months, Brother Buckley began to say, "How you, Beck?" whenever he saw me. I was pleased that we had reached the level of name-shortening. Yes, it is generally protocol to address missionaries with their title (Elder or Sister) and their full last name, but I was nonetheless proud that somehow I had gained this level of rapport with him. I didn't notice that his greeting was often accompanied by a sly grin.

One day, Brother Buckley asked me if I understood any Dutch. (Aruba makes up part of the Dutch Caribbean, and most people here are fluent in Dutch.) When I told him I didn't, he smiled and said, "That's good, Sis."

Another day, Brother Buckley greeted me as usual: "How you, Beck?" He chuckled, and then told me that the phrase "How you Beck" sounds just like a Dutch phrase that means, "Shut your mouth," or literally, "Shut your beak." (Beck--however it's actually spelled in Dutch--equals 'beak'). We both laughed (despite the fact I had just learned that what I thought to be a term of endearment was actually more like something you say to your obnoxious parrot). It became a running joke. Whenever he how-you-becked me, I usually responded by how-you-becking him back. When I went home, this favorite phrase became the subject line for our occasional emails.

Two weeks ago, I was there at Church when the Cardenas family asked Brother Buckley if he wanted one of their little Husky puppies. He accepted, and when they asked what he thought he would name it he smiled and said, "Beck."

I grew attached to little Beck over the next couple of weeks. She was a cute little puppy who always seemed so excited to see me when I came home to the apartment or got up in the morning.

Last week, Beck suddenly became ill. She didn't move around like before, in fact, she didn't move much at all. And she stopped eating her food. It was decided, unbeknown to me, that she had swallowed a chicken bone which was lodged between her ribs. She was taken to the vet and put to sleep, also unbeknown to me. Brother Buckley, who had put Beck "on the other side of the house" finally stopped lying to me last night when I asked him how Beck was doing. Little Beck, we will miss you.

The Wise Man and the Foolish Man...REVAMPED

Check out this song. It's got bits of our Church's Primary song, The Wise Man and the Foolish Man, so listen for that. This lady's name is June Bayley, and I was at her house with the sister missionaries the other day when she busted out this song. Pretty cool, eh?

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/audio/play/80731328/

Chinese Food

Last night we went to a really nice, authentic (as if I would know) Chinese restaurant. We brought Sherman's dad, Mr. Lee, who was born in Hong Kong. He ordered all the food for us, and our table had one of those cool spinny wheel thingies in the middle so you just put the food there and everyone takes what they want. We had roast duck, this humongous fish (which was still very much intact...eyeballs and everything), calimari, sweet and sour ribs, soup, and rice. Wow...it was delicious.

I sat next to Gerda, a delightful woman originally from Suriname. She's a nurse here on the island. Kind of quiet, but when you get her to talk or laugh you find out she's a real gem. Anyway, we sat together and made up the more quiet side of the table. After our several-course meal and a couple of hours of good conversation and freezing air-co blowing like crazy, I was about tuckered out. As a final course, the server brought out a plate of orange wedges. You know, like the kind you get at halftime when you're playing soccer.

Just as the oranges came out, the conversation took a new turn: politics. The men at the table, Brother Buckley, Mr. Lee, and senior missionary Elder Pietz really took off. They talked about wars and rumors of wars, the economy, health care, you name it. Sister Pietz, Gerda, and myself looked at each other and settled in for what we knew could be a long time...minutes, hours, days? We just knew it would be long.

So we started eating the oranges. The great thing was, the men didn't even seem to notice (or care) that the oranges were there. We women each took an orange wedge, and whirled the Lazy Susan around so each of the men could have taken an orange if they'd wanted to. Then when the still-nearly-full plate reached us again, we each took another. We thought we were pretty funny. Pretty soon we had whirled the Lazy Susan around enough times that there was only one orange slice left on the plate. Gerda said, laughing, "We'll save that one for them."

The conversation lagged on. Soon all I could think of was my need to sleep. Either at home or in public, somehow I just had to sleep. I put my head down on the table and actually managed to break the sound of politic talk just long enough for Brother Buckley to ask me if I was sick. "No," I replied, "just tired."

"Oh," he said, clearly quite relieved. And the conversation continued. I felt bad that putting my head on the table had drawn this kind of unwarranted worry, so I sat up again.

Finally, after listening to more of the never-ending debate--statistics and extreme right-wing opinions from Elder Pietz, devil's advocate-type questions from Brother Buckley, and Chinese proverb-sounding wisdom from Mr. Lee, Gerda looked and me with mischievous eyes and said, "Let's do it again. Heads on the table." So we did, laughing at our own cleverness. Brother Buckley was immediately awakened to our call for respite, and he stood up, the others unconsciously following his cue. And just like that, we were back out into the pleasantly warm island air, where we snapped these photos. Also included are photos of the feast.